The Culprit:
The Game Nipple aka the G Mammilla
What? What are you looking at?
The Problem(s):
The game nipple is a call to war for Senator Campaignous.
The game nipple angers the god-fearing retailer's god-fearing customers.
The game nipple is believed by many to desensitize the game nipple viewer to non-game nipples.
Rumors of game nipples are just as bad as actual game nipples.
Something to do with a secret network of gaming pedophiles.
Oops! There goes my Super Bowl Special.
Fun Facts:
The game nipple is descended from the non-game nipple which was invented in 1964.
Some religions believe that game nipples are a sign of the apocalypse and/or liberalism.
The game nipple is rendered largely inert when attached to a male.
The Solution(s):
Closing your eyes during birth will avoid unnecessary nipple exposure.
Buy a Wii.
Outlaw non-male characters in games.
Move to a less nipple-fearing country.
